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Thread: dating

  1. #1


    wo off my good childhood friends wanted to get married last year however the sister-inlaw off the guy refused the marrige to take place and the sis-inlaw hates the girl...both my friends lost contact with each other totally...girl is from jhb. N guy from dbn...problem being my 2 friends knew each other 4 a vewi vewi long tym ( 7yrs ) and to just lose contact is hard...so this girl needed advice she really can't 4get abt him, she worries abt him if he's safe ect, she wants to contact him but got no number n afraid off sis-inlaw.... What does my friend do????? I've tried everything I cud 2 help her been there 4 her day n night but know I dnt know what do url suggest????plz help

  2. #2

    your friend must move on

    your friend must move on......if the guy takes advice from his sister before marriage, how will he be after marriage?
    this isnt even his own sister......or parents!! he must be a man and man up! if he truly loves ur friend, he will not make excuses about the sisterinlaw. it seems like he wants her approval, and lives his life according to whether she approves or not :-S.. sadly u get men like this, who do whatever their brother and sisterinlaw say, esp if they are younger. not realizing they are prevented from living their own lives and making their own decisions. if this guy cant voice how he feels about ur friend, shes probably not that important to him to marry. marriage is not childs play.......if hes interested, he will come with his family, and meet the girls family, and then decide from there based on valid reasons whether to go ahead with the proposal or not.......

    do not allow yourself to be fooled by guys who just use family as a convenient excuse when it suits them.

    if a guy is interested in a girl......nothing will stop him from marrying her, ask any guy this, and he will tell u.

    so tell ur friend to move on and to find someone who is worthy of her time........dont let another 7 years go by.......

  3. #3
    I agree. If he has allowed someone else to come between them it really is not worthit. If he really want to make this work or even cares enough abt her he would find a way of contacting her. I also don't understand why she can't contact him? If his contact details has changed without him informing her then isn't that enough reason for her to forget about him and move on? Insha Allah in time she will find someone who will make her happy.

  4. #4

    I second that

    I have to say I agree with the previous comment - if he is really serious about her, he would not let his sil come between them. I don't think she should lose sleep over someone who doesn't feel the same way. Its hard to let go but life is hard sometimes.

  5. #5

    Angry dating part 2

    The sis inlaw got married 1st in the house then she got her sis married 2 now when my friend wanted 2 marry she disapproved bcoz she wants her cousin/ pal in the family as well...he didn't tell any1 is contact details bcoz sis took his fones away n controls who he talks to so my friend or I dnt pull him back

  6. #6

    agree with above

    if this guy is such a good friend of yours also, why dont u have his contact number to give to ur friend? if he has sister inlaw issues with your friend, why is he still not in contact with his other friends like u? just does not make sense.

    just seems like he does not want u and ur friend to contact him. also if his cell number has changed, its obvious he would still beable to contact your friend as her number would still be the same.

    its actually very difficult to loose contact with someone in this technologically advanced era. bbm, mxit, whatsap, cell number, email, facebook. so theres no excuse for this guy not contacting your friend. he doesnt want to marry her, end of story! just using the sisterinlaw as an excuse.
    give ur friend some decent advice, and tell her theres someone better out there who wont leave her pondering day and night in search of him, someone who will actually take the trouble to contact her, make sure shes ok. time for her to live her life and be happy.

    Allah knows best. theres someone out there for everyone.

  7. #7

    sorry but u are in denial

    even though the sisinlaw got married first etc, this whole thing is just so childish. why will your friend want to go into a family, where her life will be dependant on the sisinlaw!! as mentioned above, please move on. this guy has no interest in your friend! his a guy, which guy at a marriagable age, is not allowed to have a cellphone? can he think for himself? ul have to bath, feed and dress him too if at this mature marriageable age, he cant use the phone without permission. its not like his a baby! he is an adult!

    if the family wants to arrange a marriage for him with another girl, then thats their business, not yours. as the guy obviously is not objecting to the situation. if he was, he would have contacted your friend, as mentioned above, no cell phone is no excuse.

    if he wants to get married, doesnt he have any money of his own? he can call from work, he can call from a public phone. he can email your friend. there really is NO EXCUSE for him not contacting your friend.

    if he doesnt have any money or a job and thats the reason that he cant call her, then she should not be looking to marry this immature guy. when u married, your have to take responsibility and provide for your wife. he isnt even bothered if your friend is ok now, (thats obvious by him not contacting her- and dont say the cellphone story again......it costs a few cents to use a public phone....). the situation will just get worse after marriage. cos it seems like u forcing him to marry ur friend. if he wanted to willingly marry her, he would have been there with a proposal from him and his parents.

    the fact that the sisinlaw got married first and is able to dictate his life,does not make her a bad person, it makes him a fool, for listening to everyones points of views on his life besides using his own brain and deciding what he wants for himself. he is not mature for marriage at all.......

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