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Thread: confused about what to do?

  1. #1
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2012

    confused about what to do?

    Salam, I will be settling down in a month time and I am filled with fear and anxiety. It overwhelms me as I am sacrificing much to get married. I was practising as a lawyer and resigned from work as I am moving to another smaller city. I'm going to be staying with my in-laws for a few months. My future hubby is fine with the idea of me working once married however jobs are difficult to find there. I'm so worried I may give up all my ambitions to get married! My parents sacrificed all their ambtitions just to put me through varsity, I've worked hard in my career and I don't know why I feel so sad to give it all up. I've been born and raised in a city which is fast paced and I will be living my life in a slower paced place. I'm so unsure whether I'm doing the right thing. Apart from this, the guy and I are very compatible and happy. What do I do?

  2. #2
    I am in the exact situtaion, but I decided not to work after i get married. All in all, as we are going to in sha Allah, start a family as soon as possible I felt that my place was at home. I am extremely grateful to my parents for their emotional and financial support while I was studying and my career helped me when I needed it. But now I believe that by getting married and raising a family I will be fulfilling my role as muslim woman. I know that this view in modern times sounds archaic, but I want to be there for my kids and the one most important thing that I remembered is that this world is temporary, like a waiting room, and our good deeds is all that matters. A woman whose doorstep is not cracked is participating in Jihad. I do not mean to lecture you as this is only how I feel and how I came to my decision. As for your parents, I always feel that a parent sacrifices for their children not so that they can remind their children of it all the time. I am sure that your folks will be extremely happy and proud that you will make a good home filled with Allah's blessings. Most importantly, when you get married, you do not lose your degree or qualifications and perhaps stop looking at it as a sacrifice. You not giving up much but you are gaining so much more. Good luck, in sha Allah, Allah makes it asy for you and may your union be blessed.

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