View Full Version : lack of interest after baby

07-09-2012, 08:18 PM
my husband and i have always had an enjoyable relationship in the bedroom. After the recent birth of our second child, i had certain complications and i also gained excess weight in my pregnancy which i am still trying to lose. Altough he assures me that he finds me very desirable, i feel uncomfortable in my body and have find it difficult to let go and feel sexy like i used to. Combined with the fact that i am still breastfeeding and therefore dont like that area to be touched too much, i find myself unenthusiastic about sex. It makes me sad, i dont wamt to deprive my husband and i am scares that these feelings wont go away. We uses to have such a fulfilling wonderful sexual intimacy and it feels like thats disappeared forever :( has anyone experienced anything similar? Any advice?

08-09-2012, 10:39 AM
Have been through 3 children and breastfed all. A lot of the time you prob anxious the baby will want a feed while you guys are busy and also you instinctively more focused on babys needs. Its easy to say relax but so much harder to practise. Rather have a chat with huby and start planning your intimate time together. Example, right after the last evening feed where you know baby is going to sleep at least an hour or two so you then have time to relax and can then even go for a shower while huby watches over baby cos you know baby prob won't be hungry when he wakes up but might just need some comfort. Its natural to feel less passionate after child birth cos your body is tired and also more in 'mom' mode, but with time you will إنشاء الله again enjoy your husbands tender loving. Your huby seems to be compassionate so the extra weight will only become an issue if you leave him frustrated. A man has needs and if his wife is willing to oblige then outside temptation is not so appealing. It is his child too so if you stay bonded and he is not sexually frustrated he can also focus more on being a good father. I stopped breastfeeding my last one four years ago and still I get irritated when huby plays with my nipples lol. But we found other pleasure spots like my ears and surprisingly inside of elbows and knees so be willing to explore with him. He will appreciate it and hopefully you will start enjoying your alone time more too. Hope this helps.

08-09-2012, 11:02 AM
Its normal and most women go through that stage especially after childbirth. Luckily your hubby is understanding. My advice would be don't let yourself go. Being a mother is a full time job and its hard to make time for yourself I know but its very important to maintain a balance. Go and have your hair done or go for a spa treatment, something that will make you feel better about yourself. Treat yourself to some shopping. Buy something sexy your hubby would enjoy and that will make you feel desirable. Get a babysitter and arrange a date night. Go out and spend some time together. Then afterwards go all out with candles, strawberries and cream, choc, whatever your prefer, the point is to make an effort. Now I know its hard but you have to try and have a date night every month or so. It will do you good to get away from the every day duties and just focus on romance.

08-09-2012, 12:13 PM
it is very common occurance,its sometimes hormonal or the use of contraceptives that cause u to feel like this.hav patience,ur libido wil return.