I have a very urgent and important question to ask.

I work as a marketing co-ordinator – I do not work by choice but for a livelihood.

My job description includes planning events and year end parties. Unfortunately I have to be there on the nights that these parties take place. What I have managed to do is ensure that everything is running smoothly at the function and as soon as my job is done, I leave the premises as I consider the fact that I am a muslim woman first, married with children. These parties always tend to turn wild and I ensure that I am not there when that happens.

A major problem I face is that my husband also has yearend parties that he would like to attend. He has been attending them every year not that I am happy with that but I haven’t refrained him.

However this year, his party is in a club and I strongly feel that it is not right and appropriate for a muslim married man to be at such gatherings.

He understands that but yet feels that I am trapping him and “controlling” his life. So he is not very happy with me.

Secondly, he has an upcoming team building event that is taking place at Warmbaths. Again, I feel that it is wrong for him to attend this – I think the reasons are obvious.

I don’t think any woman would like to see her husband in the company of half naked women with alcohol. There isn’t any muslim colleagues that he knows there at this function and I fear that influences and temptations are there. Shaitaan is always waiting in the wing to come between a husband and wife.

My husband has sworn me and insulted me and threatened to divorce me as “I am controlling his life, making him feel trapped” because I have said that he can’t go and asked him how would he feel if I went to a place like this and mix with my male colleagues... He went as far as saying that I am not his type of woman and he is not my type of man.. All this because I am concerned about my husband, his deen and my marriage...

Maulana / Mufti / AAlim you advise me on this and what steps to take further? Am I being paranoid or do I have a right as his wife to put my foot down on this one?