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Thread: Fiance' flirting with someone via SMS

  1. #11
    Joburger
    Guest

    Don't be judgmental

    Quote Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
    I would not go ahead and marry him. He won't change. He would not be doing that if you meant everything to him.
    We should be careful about being judgmental about someone by listening to a small snippet about the person's life. Here we have heard only one side of the story. Whether the flirting was serious or not depends on the intention of the guy. Sometimes, humorous flirting can become serious; but in many workplace situations it is usually harmless. We should be careful about advising this woman not to marry her fiancée as "he won't change". Marriage is about trust, respect, understanding, love and compromises. Sometimes a guy may think that it is okay to flirt while he is single; but he may realize that he has to change his habits when he is married. If your fiancée has other good qualities that attract you to him, please do not allow this incident of flirting stand in your way. But, as others have advised, discuss it with him, explain how you feel, but also give him the chance to explain and make sure you listen. It is only through talking and listening that we understand each other, and in that way you will build a successful relationship.

  2. #12
    Unregistered
    Guest

    just a few thoughts

    slmz,

    i would just like to say, that fair enough, he is not married yet, but the fact is that he is engaged! thus he is no longer single........

    being engaged, and being single are two different things.

    also, if he has to make mention to this girl when he saw her, in passing by at work, something about her bum, that couldve been taken as a joke. i understand your concerns, as he went out of his way to sms her and wrote that comment about her bum.

    there has to be boundaries to the way we communicate wit others, especially if we have a fiance, wife, husband etc. because of respect for them, we need to take caution as to the way we reply to messages, or talk to people off the opposite sex. if we ourselves do not have respect for the person we are going to marry, how can others be expected to show them respect!
    harmless flirting can lead to someone close to us being hurt. so for that reason, its best to look out for the feelings of our loved ones, and for that reason, i feel what your fiance did is inappropriate. and he IS NOT SINGLE! he is your fiance! (to the people who commented saying he is single).

    speak to him about it, he may see your point of view and understand where u are coming from and refrain from this type of behaviour going forward. i am sure he would not like you messaging guys at your work about their 6-pack etc.

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