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Thread: My sister in law keeps calling and smsing my husband

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  1. #1
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    My sister in law keeps calling and smsing my husband

    Slmz

    I am having an issue with my Husbands brothers wife. On weekends we all meet at my mother in laws house.
    If she is there before us, she calls my husband and speaks to him. When ever she has an issue she phones or smss my husband.
    We have a good relationship and she does have my number but she would always rather communicate with my husband.
    This has been going on for about a year now and i have spoken to him about it but he does not see it like i do.
    Last night she sent him an sms saying, "I am here now and you did not come, we will be leaving just now."
    I dont know what to do as i am newly married and dont want to cause family problems with my in laws.
    please advise

  2. #2
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    Next time she sms's him. You reply from your phone. Soon she will communicatwe with you instead of him.

  3. #3
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    No don't be afraid stop it at any cost cause its wrong ... And ask her if her husbands knows what she does

  4. #4
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    Speak to your husband with kindness and love.
    First tell him that you don't want to offend anyone anyone and you're not here to hurt anyone or break relations.
    Explain to him that it's inappropriate for her to send him smses and to call him.
    Explain that if she has something to discuss, she should rather discuss it with you as his wife.
    Explain to your husband that you do not discuss/call/text his brother for unnecessary and trivial things, as you respect the relationship boundaries that you have with him that's been specified by the Almighty.

    Tell him about the following hadith:

    Prophet Muhammad s.a.w said: “Keep yourselves away from non-mahram women.” One companion asked: “O Rasul Allah, tell me, can the husband's brother mix freely with his sister-in-law.” Prophet Muhammad (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) replied, “He is like death for a woman.” [Sahih Bukhari]

    Allah in His Infinite Wisdom has prohibited the free mixing of the sexes to preserve the sanctity of the family and the peace of family life. This hadith tells us clearly that the husband's brother or brother's wife definitely count as non-mahrams and that the rules of segregation between non-mahrams apply between them more than ever.

    I hope this helps you inshAllah

  5. #5
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    Make a whatsapp/bbm group & include ur brother inlaw & sister inlaw? Have the whole family on.

  6. #6
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    don't let this go on any further

    She probably has feelings for your husband, this kind of thing is never purely innocent. She's staying close to him the only way she knows how. I think you should be extremely weary of her. And if your husband is entertaining this closeness iw ould watch him too. You need to be frank and honest with her and tell her its making you very uncomfortable.

  7. #7
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    The next time you guys are all together as a family casually mention something that she messaged your hubby about. Eg. I saw on his phone that you were waiting for us. We were running late that day. Was there something you needed to discuss? Each time relate the message when you are all together. That way her hubby will also realize how often it occurs and maybe it will caution her also about how inappropriate it is. Obviously both of them know that its not the norm and both still entertain it. Do this in a nice, calm manner without getting defensive. Maybe when its known by all what is occuring the habit will break. Good luck

  8. #8
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    Since I have not seen the situ, I cannot say whether it is or is not innocent. But I think you should be wary of over reacting, My husband and I have been married for 5 years. My (younger) brother in law in single, but when he had a gf, I would never contact her, I did not know her so well so I didn't. There was def nothing going on. It may be something like that, it is not necessarily that she has intentions on your husband. If she did and he felt the same, obv he would not have married you.
    However, that being said, if you feel uncomfortable, then you need to tell her that your hubby is bad at checking his phone, something like that, and she would have better luck getting a hold of you. The next time she sms or calls, tell your hubby to ignore it.

  9. #9
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    You need to tell ur hubby u unhappy with it n if she calling to ask where he is then she def has other motives. Next time she calls answer his phone n say he is not avail, is there anything u can help with, when she sms reply n put ur name. Call her n tell her to stay away from ur hubby. If this dsnt end tell him u going home n take a brk n c if he does anything to avoid her.

    Damn she has a hubby yet interferes with urs.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
    The next time you guys are all together as a family casually mention something that she messaged your hubby about. Eg. I saw on his phone that you were waiting for us. We were running late that day. Was there something you needed to discuss? Each time relate the message when you are all together. That way her hubby will also realize how often it occurs and maybe it will caution her also about how inappropriate it is. Obviously both of them know that its not the norm and both still entertain it. Do this in a nice, calm manner without getting defensive. Maybe when its known by all what is occuring the habit will break. Good luck
    This is a very a good idea! TRY IT!

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