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Thread: Divorced and kids, she won't marry me

  1. #1
    Administrator Nanima's Avatar
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    May 2012

    Divorced and kids, she won't marry me

    Nanima please help - Ladies please give me some insight here, What exactly is wrong if a guy is divorced and has kids? does that make him less of a man or less eligible, does the fact that he can love, support and take care of his kids make him less attractive to the fairer sex? I could be way off the mark here but if a guy has kids and can love and care for them as well as a mother can does that not make him a real man a better one maybe because he is in the role of a caregiver already, is that not what women want? some1 that in adverse conditions and situations can raise up and stand tall, does this not prove that the women will be loved because a man that can love his daughter can love and hounour his women? Any guy can Say i love you to a women but does the fact that its visible for all to see that he is capable of loving and caring? Would "you" (ladies) really look at the guys kids as something or maybe even a barrier and run in the opposite direction even if you are TRULY happy with the guy and really in love with him, Would this deter you from pursuing a relationship purely because the guy you are madly in love with has kids and is divorced? no disrespect meant to any women and if you are offended i profusely apologize, Women tend to look at the "bad cases" which i know and admit are VERY common. But would you throw away a great relationship on what ifs? nothing and no one can guarantee anything granted but if a man treats you like a queen would you discard it or grab on and hold on for dear life knowing deep down his man would make you his everything? #veryconfused

  2. #2
    From a lady, no there is nothing wrong with being divorced and with kids, but best you find someone who is open minded and willing to accept you as you are...

  3. #3
    It is awesome that you are taking care of your kids. The only way a relationship will work is if you find the kind of woman who will take care of your kids as her own as well. If she doesn't want to do that now then amplify that situation by 100 when you are married. The last thing you want is evil stepmom. In sha Allah you will be sent someone who will will be not only a partner for you but a best friend and caregiver to your children.

    I was involved with someone knowing he has kids that may live with us and it is extremely intimidating but if you have a clean heart then it shouldn't be a problem. When the first one arrived I got the fright of my life to realise that this is an entire being that I now have to navigate my way in caring for. But as in all things in life its a challenge and as long as you and your spouse are able to discuss and resolve sensitive issues with regard to the kids you shouldn't have a problem.

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