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Thread: Please help, scared.

  1. #1
    Unregistered
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    Please help, scared.

    Salaams. I want to get married and have been proposed to by someone suitable. Its just that due to hormonal issues that ive had, i have a lot of discoloration/pigmentation in intimate Areas that cant be sorted by creams or medications. I've always been embarrassed that someone will have to see my body but now I am really scared and don't know what to do, im terrified that on my wedding night or honeymoon he will be completely put off and feel mislead and it will turn downhill for me.

    I know your intimates are to be a shade or two darker than usual, but I can literally play ebony and ivory with my coloration difference. Please help and advise.

  2. #2
    Unregistered
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    Discoloration

    I would be honest and let him know. If you can't be honest about it now, you still have an entire lifetime of marriage to get through where much more serious issues will need honesty. It shouldn't be a major factor for him, and if it is, you already have a major glimpse at his values. Do not be insecure about yourself as this will lead to problems in your life and marriage. Don't let fear rule and trust in God.

  3. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
    I would be honest and let him know. If you can't be honest about it now, you still have an entire lifetime of marriage to get through where much more serious issues will need honesty. It shouldn't be a major factor for him, and if it is, you already have a major glimpse at his values. Do not be insecure about yourself as this will lead to problems in your life and marriage. Don't let fear rule and trust in God.

    We have not have an intimate discussions or anything of the sort for me to bring up such foward topic, how would I bring it up.I'm inexperienced when it comes to being open with men, as I've always felt ashamed that i would never settle down due to such conditions. I'm so confused and scared and i have no idea what to do or say.

  4. #4
    Unregistered
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    Discoloration

    It depends how far you are in process. If you are near to be formally engaged or engaged, that is probably only when you can have such a conversation. Before this is too soon and too intimate. Possibly ask what is important to him in a spouse. Ask him what physical attributes. Mention you have dark patches on your skin, no need to say more. If he queries further, you can hint. All women have some defect as do men. Don't feel so negative about it.

    I used to have skin darkening on my body too in my 20s, it is gone now. I think it has to do with liver function, so try eating lots of greens.

    I hope things work out for you, but possibly you are worrying too much. I don't know his personality or how your relationship is so you will have to see what's best for you.

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