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Thread: Can the Ulama help???

  1. #1
    Unregistered
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    Can the Ulama help???

    I am saddened to see so many wives complaining about their husbands.. being in a similar situation with husband issues, I can safely say our men of today are gone astray and are getting influenced by the west.

    Are there any guidance for these males left? Can the ulama not chip in and make real men out of these males who are causing so much pain and heartache to their wives and families???

    I feel that Qiyamah is so near just the mere fact that husbands do not worry about their families and responsibilities anymore...

    Allah help us all women and give us patience to get through these difficult times.. Ameen.

    Being a woman and mother is so so so hard that only another woman can understand that...

  2. #2
    Unregistered
    Guest
    I truly believe they should be counselled before they even attempt being married. We don't get this. My friends from other cultures are required to get the talk by a panel of senior men in the faith and it ranges from menstruation to hugs and kisses.

  3. #3
    Unregistered
    Guest

    Quran

    We are all roaming in darkness looking to answers everywhere besides the Quran.
    We read this treasure without understanding it.
    This is why we have so much of suffering...
    The best counsel for everything, including marriage is in the Quran. What a tragedy that we look elsewhere....

  4. #4
    Unregistered
    Guest

    Quran

    Only Allah can help. We are all roaming in darkness looking to answers everywhere besides the Quran.
    We read this treasure without understanding it.
    This is why we have so much of suffering...
    The best counsel for everything, including marriage is in the Quran. What a tragedy that we look elsewhere....

  5. #5
    Joburger
    Guest

    Pre-marital counselling

    Quote Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
    I truly believe they should be counselled before they even attempt being married. We don't get this. My friends from other cultures are required to get the talk by a panel of senior men in the faith and it ranges from menstruation to hugs and kisses.
    I fully agree with this suggestion of pre-marital counselling for men and women. I don't know if such counselling exists in any Muslim community in South Africa. I watched a programme on the Jewish community in Manchester & they showed how the Rabbi meets with the groom and the bride separately over several days, and then one meeting together, a few seeks before the wedding to give advice on all the issues that a newly married couple will face. Even a young Rabbi had to go for pre-marital counselling before his wedding. It was compulsory. He explained that even he had to learn about some issues such as what to expect on the wedding night.
    I would suggest that such pre-marital counselling should be compulsory so that both the man and the woman understand the implications of married life and the importance of nurturing the relationship through communication, respect, trust and love. Such counselling provides an opportunity for the couple to ask questions they may feel uncomfortable asking family members or friends, obtain Islamic advice on relations in marriage and provide an understanding of the rights and duties of each of them within the marriage. Ulema should not arrange a date for the nikah unless the couple have been for pre-marital counselling.
    I wish I had such pre-marital counselling. It would have avoided much misunderstanding and some unhappiness during the first crucial years of marriage.

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