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Scarlet
25-06-2012, 04:52 PM
Salaams.
I am a professional woman who has chosen to become a home executive after marriage. My husband has no problem with that and shukr alhumdulillah he earns more than enough to support us both and still save 4 our future. My husband does not give me an allowance of my own, instead I purchase whatever I need 4 myself and the home directly using his bank cards. I'm very grateful that I am not restricted in that way.
The problem I have though is that my husband does not believe in certain things, n he will refuse to pay 4 them or buy them. He does not believe in giving gifts, any charity besides Zakaat and sadaqah and He also does not believe in me going 4 regular waxing/threading/laser etc. I am a very giving person, when I was working, I would regularly give gifts to my family and friends, not extravagant gifts but just something small even if its a chocolate. I also am a passionate supporter of charity and wud regularly donate to causes such as palestine or to the needy people in my community.
When I got married, I had quite a bit of my own money saved 4rm when I worked. My plan was to not spend that money as its my life savings, but when I saw my husband's attitude towards certain things, I wud end up taking out my money to buy gifts 4 my fam n to donate to charity. I was also in the middle of going 4 laser hair removal which is quite pricy. My husband refused to pay 4 the laser so I finished all my savings. Once my savings were depleted, my husband started giving me an allowance every month, but the moment I spent a portion of my allowance on charity or on a gift 4 some1 he stopped the allowance and said if he gives me money its 4 me only, no1 else. I feel like if he gives me an allowance, he shud give it willingly and not dictate to me how I spend it. As long as I don't spend it on haraam things.
When my husband withdrew the allowance, I didn't wana beg or seem desperate so I just left it. Now its really starting to bug me again.
My hubby says if I want to buy gifts and give to charity and all that then I shud go back to work. its not that simple 4 me. I feel I will be more miserable going back to work as my line of work is emotionally demanding and if I work, it will be 4 the sole reason of making money which will be unfair to my clients who deserve so much more 4rm me as a professional. I have no love 4 my profession.
Please help.
Jazakallah.

Unregistered
01-11-2012, 07:00 PM
I dnt knw much bwt financial issue bt i do knw dat if money is given 2 u it is a gift unles statd otherwise...it is realy unfair that he gives u da money bt tels u wat 2 do wit it,i tink u should either tel him or if he gives u da money u spend hw u want 2,u dnt need 2 tel him wat u do wit ur money