View Full Version : No baby

22-10-2012, 09:04 AM
slmz. Im married for over three years now and still haven't fallen pregnant. I feel so despondent. I cant help but feel jealous when others say they pregnant. i hate going out because people will always ask when are we making a plan. Ive isolated myself so, I just go to work and back home. I know that its wrong for feeling this way but I just cant help it.

18-11-2012, 01:13 PM
Slmz , I've been married for 2 yrs as well, and no baby, don't want to see people or go to family there's always those looks of pity,I can't stand it!,I've been to see gynae , nothing is wrong with me, we're just not having intercourse regularly, its like my husband has lost his desire to be with be me,its been year 2 now and we have had intercourse twice, this is sucha dilemma , I'm ready to throw in the towel, but love him so much,he refuses to speak about the baby issue or our intimacy issue, and gets so angry and stays angry for days if I bring it up, its been 3 mnths ago that I've tried to bring up the topic, Ya Allah I just don't know what to do..
I know I'm not helping u ,and I'm really sorry for that, I just feel that I can relate to your story...

22-11-2012, 05:56 PM
This is not the case for everyone and there is such a thing as sub-fertility where there is no actual explanation for not being pregnant as both spouses are medically fit. Allah Ta'ala might have even decreed that some of us might not get offspring.

However, my husband and I have been tested medically and everything was fine with us. During a lot of discussion, depression and heartache, we finally decided to discuss the matter with a verified aamil and we've recently found out that our case is due to the terrible issue of 'jadoo' (astaghfirullah). My dear sister with the intimacy issue, sometimes jadoo can create that as well. However, find out if there is a psychological issue first. However, your husband could be suffering from a low testosterone issue or even an issue relating to diabetes. It is quite common and he needs to visit a good endocrinologist to help him. Dr Wing at Donald Gordon in JHB is apparently quite good.

There is hope in my story. My husband and I have gotten closer in our prayers and our journey. We've turned to Allah, read our duas everyday, pray together and try our best to keep a positive outlook. Our relationship was once on the rocks, but it's slowly coming right. Sometimes Allah allows certain things to happen for a reason. That of course can only occur if a couple is open in the lines of communication.

Ladies, can I suggest going for medical checkups, trying everything you can medically - you and your spouse get tested, get prenatal vitamins, ovulation kits, make constant istighfaar, get up for tahajjud, fast, constantly praise Allah, etc.
Read these duas:
1. Rabbi hab li min ladunka dhuriyyatun tayyibah innaka sami ud dua. (Quraan, Al Imran:38)
2. Rabbi la tadharni fardan wa anta khayrul waarithin. (Quraan, Al anbiya:89)

Inshalllah we will all conceive soon! Ameen!

11-12-2012, 08:37 PM
In sha Allah Ameen sister! Your words are so comforting,and it lifted my spirits a few notches! Jazaakallah sister may Allah guide us all