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confused
20-07-2012, 11:15 AM
Hi guys- marrieD for 3 years. I just would like to kn0w if any of Ya feel unApprecIated? And Also feel thAt ur hubbys do a lotta Rong that u take a blind eye 2. R all marriages This wAy? Is it Supposed 2 Be like this? Do All Men cheat on their wives? He also won't Let me work or Hav any contact With friends Yet he obviously can. How to let go or Somethin Coz he is not willing To change. Bear in mInd I Cnt let go

Unregistered
22-07-2012, 12:00 PM
Yea. I think we women are jus too lenient. My husband doesn't cheat but does take me for granted n always ready wit an insult. And yea they do wrong things and feel justified. But I let my husband know that I'm aware of what he is doing. I can't let go cos I don't think I wil survive without him. Plus we have a child who thinks his father is an angel

Unregistered
02-08-2012, 04:17 PM
Hi guys- marrieD for 3 years. I just would like to kn0w if any of Ya feel unApprecIated? And Also feel thAt ur hubbys do a lotta Rong that u take a blind eye 2. R all marriages This wAy? Is it Supposed 2 Be like this? Do All Men cheat on their wives? He also won't Let me work or Hav any contact With friends Yet he obviously can. How to let go or Somethin Coz he is not willing To change. Bear in mInd I Cnt let go

Not all marriages are this way. And not all men cheat. In fact, I would go so far as saying that the number of Muslim/Indian men who cheat are very minimal. We respect and love our wives, even though they can drive us TOTALLY insane. I allow my wife to work (though not full-time - as we have a kid), and she has contact with her (female) friends, go to the gym, mall, shopping, etc. I used to worry about whether I could trust her, but then realised that she probably worries about the same things as me. We can't be policeman over each other - it will drive you insane.

I bought her a car, and she goes wherever she wants. I trust her, and she trusts me. But we still drive each other insane. Marriage is really hard work. Keeping things together is one of the toughest challenges you'll ever face. But if you can hold strong, and keep it together, it is the most satisfying and joyful thing on earth.

Don't expect things to always be perfect. There is no such thing, and there is also no such thing is normal.

I'm not sure what sort of wrong things he is doing, but DO NOT TURN A BLIND EYE to it, especially if it is flirting, porn, cheating, zina, etc. Make it a BIG DEAL. By turning a blind eye, you are telling him that it is acceptable, and you don't mind. Fight with him and argue with him about it, every single time. If you don't do this, things could get worse.

You say that you can't let him go. Why? Do not let him think that you can't let him go, can't do without him. He will just take even more advantage. Tell him that he needs to stop, otherwise you're leaving. Have respect for yourself. Don't allow him to trample over you, and your rights. Be sure that you also don't trample over him, and his rights.

Good luck. Wish you all the best.